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Health disaster cont'd + Scotland adventures are nearing


So, bad news first, aka a health update: I was starting to feel way better after my thyroid levels leveled out. Until suddenly I started feeling worse again, in a similar but not quite the same way - My throat for the most part works alright, but the reflux and bloating came back with a vengeance. Soon enough, I stopped eating much again, and started losing weight again in a very-not-healthy way. Sure enough, this led to more anxiety, and even a full-blown panic attack at work. (Thankfully my coworkers were kind about it, and just let me go about wandering the cubicles in the back teary-eyed with my hands gripping my neck/head until I calmed down - this was actually the first time I had a panic attack that bad, probably because I normally found a supervisor and begged off work sick before it got that bad, and alas, all supervisors were in a meeting at that time. I suppose that worked out better for me in the end, forcing me to work through it instead of letting it completely disrupt my life...)

ANYHOO, I digress. SO, more feeling awful, but I was on the fence about seeing the doctor for it since I was leaving within a couple months anyways and I've lost faith in family doctors and I knew that I would never get an appt with a specialist before I left. I was thinking maaaaaybe it was an ulcer, but I wasn't too sure. And then my menstrual cycle popped by to say hello. I normally get really, truly awful crippling cramps, but taking prescription ibuprofen all day for several days keeps it at bay, and my gut is normally perfectly okay with it. Whelp, this time, my heartburn/reflux/misery got REALLY bad right after that cycle of NSAIDs. Like, so bad that I could barely eat anything and really, really didn't even want to leave my bed for a week. And this got the ulcer wheel turning a bit stronger, so I nagged my doctor (a different one from the last moron) to get me an H. pylori test. Finally got that back today, and it was a big fat positive.

SO, bright side: Probable diagnosis! It's less likely to be some random mystery upper GI illness and I can start treating it! (I was so happy about this that I actually whooped for joy when the test came back positive.)
Not so bright side: Treatment consists of a cocktail of antibiotics so massive that by the end of the 2wks, I'm sure that even if the infection is all gone, I'll still be feeling like complete crap. And there's a chance that it might not be enough and that I could still have an infection by the end of it. And no NSAIDs until I don't have any more ulcer symptoms, so AHAHAHAHAHA I'll probably be curled up in bed crying for several days during my next wave of cramps, which is due in less than 2wks. (Also, reflux after taking 3 abx pills is sooooooooooo unpleasant... And apparently clarithromycin makes my gut reeeeeally gurgly. It feels really, really weird. Huuuurgh. EDIT/UPDATE: Food helps with the gurgly, but now I'm nauseous. And it also comes with a spectacularly nasty taste in the mouth. I'm hoping the nausea goes away, or at least stays really mild. I'm not sure my poor emitaphobic heart would be able to take it otherwise...)
Overly-optimistic bright side: Whelp, if I have any other random bacterial infections that I'm not aware of, at least those'll get knocked out, too. :'D

Not so bright side pt2: Treatment is for 2 weeks. Chances of still feeling blargh by the time I leave for Scotland in less than 3 weeks is pretty high.

Very very bright side: I'M LEAVING FOR SCOTLAND IN 3 WEEKS!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't decide if I'm more excited or more terrified. My plane ticket is booked, my visa application is somewhere in New York (hopefully in the process of getting approved and sent back to me soon), and I have a room to live in for July (and then I get to do the whole flat-hunting thing once I get there). I've been on a shopping spree for good winter/rain gear, including a waterproof backpack and a waterproof laptop case, and a brand new touchscreen laptop (his name is Jack, a 13" Asus flipbook, and he has been a great replacement so far for Steve, my giant 17" HP that is currently living the retired life), and tomorrow, I'm planning on getting an iPod touch (my 9.5yr old iPod video is still alive and kicking with a 4hr battery life, and I'll definitely keep it, but I need something with a longer battery life for the way too long plane ride, and the camera + internet access + Face Time is going to be a very, very nice thing to have abroad). I almost never buy anything really nice for myself and instead use the money for horsey things (see: the 9.5yr old iPod and the wardrobe consisting almost entirely of Target clothes and hand-me-downs), so this shopping spree has been pretty fun, haha. And to kind of mark such a big and exciting change in my life, I chopped off all my hair. I've aaaaaalways had long hair, which I always kept in a ponytail since I hated having it in my face/in the way, and I went to full pixie cut, and I LOVE IT! On the one hand, I kind of wish I had the guts to do it sooner, but on the other hand, I'm glad I didn't, because the timing right now is just too perfect. A new look for a new adventure.

Because Scotland is a thing. That is definitely happening. And happening soon. So very soon. Eep!

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